Wednesday, January 09, 2008

This Ever Happen to You?

I got up a little early this morning and took my time while leaving the house. I changed the cat litter, brought Matt some water now that he's picked up the Death Cough I'd been suffering with over the weekend. I thought about making coffee, but didn't. I stared into the refrigerator, waiting for it to reveal its secrets to me. What is in that bowl? Are those ramen noodles and ... ham? What the hell is that? I pulled out a congealed bowl of goo, thought better of it and then set it back down. Wiping my hands off on my skirt I figured it was about time to go.
I pulled on my green Anne Taylor coat and slid on my new cashmere lined gloves. I love these things. I kicked the cat away from the door and tromped out to the garage. I slid the key into the car door and easily popped up the lock. I reached for the door and pulled. Nothing happened. I frowned at the lock and then tugged again. Okay... I locked the door and unlocked it again. Still, the door wouldn't opened.
I peered into the car trying to see if the seat belt had gotten jammed in the door. No, that looked fine. I whacked at the lock with the heel of my hand. Not only was it obvious that this did no good, but it hurt. So, I employed what my Mama gave me and took a swing at the door with my ample hips. The car rocked back a bit. Nothing.
I took a more aggressive approach and kind of put my whole body into whacking against the door. I don't understand what happened. I washed the car, but that was on Saturday. How could the door be frozen shut? Giving up on the driver's side, I squeezed around the disgusting contents of my garage.
When we'd moved in, the people who own the house took nothing out of the tiny garage. I had to artfully stack three chairs on top of a dryer with all sorts of odd car parts, laundry sorter, Rubbermaid tubs full of papers and empty Heineken mini kegs. There's all this saw dust and mouse evidence on the shelf by the front passenger side of the car. I ew! ew! ew!ed my way around and tried that door. Again the door unlocked easily, but wouldn't budge.
Well, what the hell. I'd be damned if I was taking that stinky bus ride that lasts about two hours. There had to be a way to get in.
I tried locking and unlocking the door over and over while gently coaxing her into submission by whining, "Come OOOOOOOONNN!!!" The last time I turned the key all the way to the left suddenly all four of the windows of the car rolled down automatically.
That's new.
I turned the key back and the windows went up, and the lock went down, car beeped, alarm engaged. What the hell kind of a safety feature is that?
So, I did it again, and the windows all rolled down obediently. I wasn't exactly sure how I was going to get out once I got to work, but I knew how I was getting in the car.


At 1:44 PM , Anonymous andy said...

Oh, to answer the question in your title...yes. Not the most of it, but when I was once retrieving wine (WINE!) from the backseat of your car, the Misadventure of the Opening Windows occurred.

I had no idea what to do.

I remember reaching into your car through the open window, swiping the bottles, turning the key the other way, and running back to the apartment entrance.

All I can say is that your car was there in the morning, whether or not it was locked or the windows were all-the-way closed.

And the wine was worth it.

At 4:05 AM , Anonymous Loberg/the Birthday Girl TODAY said...

Okay, that post was hilarious. Whoever thought I'd think of the Duke boys while in Paris?

At 10:53 AM , Anonymous Sherry said...

I actually have heard of it. Some people do it to cool a car down in the summer before they get in.

At 10:56 AM , Blogger Joy Estelle said...


That makes so much SENSE now! It makes even more sense that it's a convertible! Five years and I never once encountered this really handy little function on the car. I could be putting the top down without even OPENING the car door. That's just genius. I'm an idiot!

At 5:35 PM , Anonymous CresceNet said...

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At 3:54 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

hilarious Joy, any pixs from getting into the car? That's what all of your readers want to know.


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